Motherhood

Let me start off this post by clarifying I am NOT pregnant.  I repeat: NOT pregnant.  However, I've recently had an experience (about two hours ago) that I haven't been able to stop thinking about.

I want to start at the beginning and give a little background on the subject.  I have worked at my current job for about a year and a half.  During the course of this employment venture, I have developed a friendly relationship with my boss.  She frequently asks me about things that are going on in my life and is pretty well up to date with what is happening with my schooling, marriage, family, etc.  We have some really good talks with one another regarding all of these topics.  However, this morning when I went into work, I had a conversation with her that I haven't been able to stop thinking about since it occurred.

I have informed my boss that I will be leaving this job at the end of summer. Due to the fact that I am employed by Nevada State College, and given that I will no longer be attending school there in the fall, I technically lose my job.  That being said, my boss has relentlessly tried to keep me.  She has tried everything! She has pulled me into her office and tried to plan out a degree path for me, she has mentioned hiring me on as a full time staff member, part time staff member, etc.  I appreciate these gestures because it shows she cares about my well-being, and wants me to succeed.

I have a couple of issues with school right now.

1. I am extremely close to obtaining my AA which means I will then have to pick a major
2. I have no idea what I want to be when I 'grow up'
3. Given that my husband is almost done with his BS, we will most likely be moving in about a year
4. I don't want to waste time or money taking classes I don't need, or wont transfer if we have to move for my husband's grad school.

That being said, I have seriously considered taking time off from school once I am finished with my AA.

This morning, as I was working, the topic of my  leaving was brought up again.  I hate these conversations, because every single time I have them with people in general there is always a tone of disappointment in their voices when I say I may not return to school after I finish my AA.  Not to mention all the 'life advice' people seem to throw at you, even when you don't ask for it.  Anyways, the conversations that I have regarding my leaving school always go a little something like this:

"I just really hate to see you leave.  Most people leave college, and they don't come back!"
"So you're really just dropping out?"
"Even if you don't know what you want to do, at least keep taking classes"
*and my two personal favorites....

"Well what if you get pregnant, then you'll never finish your degree"
"Women who get pregnant before the age of 25 are 75% more likely to live below the poverty line"

So by the time my boss and co-worker stared giving me the usual run down, I could feel myself getting so irritated and annoyed.  Not only to I feel as if I am never truly listened to, but it is extremely hard for me to express the way I feel to my boss.  A 37 year old feminist who has never been married, doesn't have children, and has almost always chosen her career over everything else.  Now I see nothing wrong with that. I have nothing against people who seek fulfillment through advancements in their careers.  I think it's great.

I've never really had a good idea of what I would pursue as a career path, but one thing I have ALWAYS been sure of, is that I want to be a mom someday.  Not tomorrow, maybe not even in five years, but one day. Both my mother, and my religion have fueled my desire to have children. And I want to raise my children similar to how my mother raised me.   I have a wonderful mom. I was fortunate enough to have a mom who was able to stay home with my throughout my childhood, and that is exactly what I want to do once I have children.  I don't want to miss out on important life events because I'm forced to work.  Not to mention I know plenty of women who had children extremely young, and how gone back to school and have been successful.  I truly believe that I can have my cake and eat it to.

So my question is this:

How do you explain this to someone?

I am aware that my views on having children are not shared by the world.  Women nowadays are focusing on their careers more, and having children later on in life.  That isn't something I'm interested in.  I don't want to be 60 when my children are just hitting their 20's.  I definitely want to be young when my children are having children.  I want to be able to enjoy a nice big family and be healthy enough to do any activity my grandchildren can do.  I want to be able to relate to my kids on a level that older parents can't.  I wan't to be able to enjoy my retirement. I would like to go on a couples mission with my husband!  I personally, think being a mother the most important thing a woman will ever do with her life.  But how do I explain to people that a fancy corporate job will never truly be fulfilling to me.  Never.  The only way I will ever truly be fulfilled will be through raising, loving, enjoying, and spending as much time with my family as possible.

This doesn't make me 'stupid' and I don't feel like I'm 'putting everyone before me and my success'.  I still value education.  I'm not trying to belittle that.  My point in all of this, is that I think motherhood is just as, if not more important that any other top career out there.  It is not something to be taken lightly, and its not something you can do halfway, and then just give up.  Motherhood is a life long job, and something that should be celebrated.  I think it should be a priority, not a second thought.

With that being said, I love my husband.  I love my Savior.  I love my Parents.  These are the only people I need to answer to.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Recently I posted a status on my face book page asking the question, "What should my next blog post be about?" My mother, of course, replied "ME!" (selfish).  Even though I'm about 65% sure she was joking, I have decided to dedicate this entire blog post to the woman who gave me life.  The most amazing mother in the whole world, Cynthia Alice Hunt Bailey.

I was fortunate enough to have a mother who was able to stay home with four rambunctious kids while we were growing up.  For those of you who know the Bailey family, know that we have, and always will be a lot to handle.  That being said, I think the best way to describe my mom would be 'patient'.  She worked hard everyday to teach us the things mothers teach children, and sacrificed a lot so that we would have all that we needed.  Words cannot express how incredibly grateful I am for this woman.

I received a text this morning that I feel is share-worthy.  At 9:28 this morning, my mother texted me saying,

"Just letting you know that Landan wished me a happy borthday over an hour ago.... stiiilll haven't heard from you. (; "  And yes, she really said borthday.  Looks like 'one year older and wiser too' doesn't always hold true does it Red? (:

So today it is your birthday mom. Should I tell everyone how old you're turning? (just kidding, of course.... 29....) And to honor your birthday I thought I would compile a small collection of pictures that I love of my beautiful, loving, intelligent, hard-working, hilarious mother.  This woman is incredible.  Let's take a minute to congratulate the winner of the 'Mother of the Year' award for the past 21.5 years!  Happy Birthday Red.

Family Pictures Christmas 09'

Cancun Mexico 

My fabulous Mom and Dad

January 7, 2011 

Bucca Di Beppo

The Perfect Bun

Hello my six blog followers, (and all others who might read this), do I have a treat for you?! I have struck gold. One of the latest and greatest hairstyles of this trend cycle is this little cutie:

Ahhhh yes.  The Top Knot.

This style is so elegant and versatile! You can wear this hair style with jeans and a top or with an evening gown! The possibilities are endless.  So I know you're thinking, "Well these two lovely ladies have celebrity stylists, I couldn't possibly get my hair to do that!" WRONG! I found this handy dandy little video that will help you out!  I've tried it, and it's easy as pie.  The classiest hairstyle at the drop of a hat, no haitstylist needed.  Give it a try ladies! I guarentee you'll love it, and let me know how it goes.

Top Knot Video [make sure you scroll down to the vid]

Get the Look for Under $70.00

Alright people, back again! Today I have a cute little outfit that is perfect for springtime! You can get my rendition of this entire outfit for less than $70.00!!

If you'll notice, this outfit also has a cute pair of cheetah shoes! This is just a perfect example of how versatile this piece can be!  Oh and keep in mind, these recreations of mine wont be exact, but I'll do my best!

Top H&M: [here] $9.95
Pants: Forever21 [here] $15.80
Shoes: Target [here] $12.99
Earrings: Foreve21 [here] $2.80
Ring: Forever21 [here] $3.80
Bag: Foever21 [here] $24.50

There you have it ladies! This ENTIRE outfit for $69.84 before tax. Again, it's not perfect! Also, it's obvious that the majority of the things I find closest to these high prices beauties, are from Forever21.  If anyone has something that they think is a better fit than what I posted, let me know! Of if you have a store that you LOVE, and is reasonably priced, let me know. (:

Get the Look for Under $60.00

Hello there! I hope everyone has had a great week so far.  So I've been doing a lot of thinking and with a little help from my number one blog fan, Anam, I realized I actually want my blog to have a purpose.  Beyond the whole 'telling about my life', which is still really important, I really want this blog to accomplish something!  So while I'm figuring this whole thing out, I thought I would do a little something along the lines of "Get the Look for under".

I, like I'm sure soooo many others are totally addicted to Pinterest.  I love the little outfits they put together for you on there! Its so convenient and whoever is putting them together has some SERIOUS style.  So as I thought about it, I decided that I could try to piece together outfits but do it for people on a budget.  Let's face it, the majority of America right now is broke with a capital B. Why should we have to sacrifice style when there are tons of fashion resources out there to help us save some cha-ching??

So here is the look I'm going to try to recreate for under $60.00.

Top: Forever 21 [here]

Leggings: H&M [here]

Shoes: Target [here]

Clutch: H&M [here]

Shades: Forever 21 [here]

Okay there you have it ladies and gents.  This entire outfit for $57.49 (before tax) !! This is a really cute and affordable outfit perfect for a anything from a date, to grocery shopping. Stay tuned for my next attempt! 

My Lust List

I have been in a frenzy lately, ladies and gentlemen.  I have this uncontrollable desire to shop!  I've spent so much time recently just lusting after clothes, jewelry and shoes.  Shout out to pinterest for feeding into that obsession... Anyways, I thought I would share my list, which I have narrowed down to 8 things (because 8 is my favorite/lucky number), juusssttt incase someone reads this, and uses some of these for birthday presents.  *cough Landan cough*.... Now some of these items are a little pricey, but my birthday isn't until August so I, being the considerate person I am, thought I would put this out there early, so there is plenty of time to save those pennies. :)  OH and since I'm such a sweetheart, I also went ahead and put them in order of price from lowest to highest JUST for you honey!

1. I feel like this sweater is just a great piece. H&M $12.95

2. These are so cute! And so cheap! Target $12.99

3. I hear lime green is going to be a hot color this season.  This swimsuit is adorable. H&M $24.95

4. Blazer.  I definitely neeeed this.  H&M $49.95

5. This belt... is soooo cute! J.Crew on sale! $59.99

6. This dress looks very retro, but sooo cute! Shabbyapple.com $82.00



7. Classic Pave Link Bracelet.  I know, I know, a little pricey.... J.Crew $118.00

 8. These shoes! The things I would do for them... Tory Burch via amazon.com $225.00

 This is my Lust List. What's on yours? I feel like this list could be made into a perfect 10 items, any suggestions??

Go Away February!

We're only 12 days into February, and I am BEGGING for it to be over.  This has literally been one of the hardest months of my existence thusfar.  So much has gone wrong in such a short amount of time, that I really feel like every time I start to get over something, another blow hits.

I wont go into details about all of my problems, because who wants to read that? I don't even want to read that. But we'll just say my family has gone through some serious tragedies as of late. Its gotten more and more difficult to find a light at the end of this February tunnel.  I know I'm not the first person to go through something like this, or the last; but the reason I started this blog was to talk about my life and experiences and this is one of them.

I think during times like this, it's important to lean on those who matter most to you.  Things are so much easier to handle and deal with when we rely on others.  Family is what makes the world go round.  When you don't have family, you really don't have much.  It's so important to focus on the good things in life, and realize that we may not have control over what others do or say, but we have absolute control over ourselves. And THAT is a great feeling.

What do you do when your down?  What helps you feel better?